5.6.07

Earlier this evening, sometime between waking up from my nap and making unnecessary cookies, an idea ripe for blogging presented itself. However, I still have to finish this ACLU essay, and aforementioned blogging idea will take much thought, so I will simply review a funny situation happened in my life recently. Things which I hope, you, valued reader, will also find hilarious. (As a quick side note, I realized my blogs are all the same. Different topics, yes, but I mostly just spew my thoughts all over the place like word garbage and sprinkle many, many questions throughout.)

As most (maybe I shouldn’t flatter myself. I change that “most” to “some”) of you know, I am a diligent student by day, and a money-making hula dancer by night. So this weekend, we had a performance for Intel’s company party in Folsom. Now, in my experience, company parties are always somewhat less enthusiastic than normal parties. Maybe people feel weird getting completely wasted around their co-workers? Not sure. Anyways. Ok, so to make our shows more…interactive, or…embarrassing, we go out into the audience, in search of unsuspecting men to bring on stage. Our musician plays some Tahitian drum music and we dance around them, they make an ass of themselves, but the crowd loves it, and when the crowd loves it, they give us tips, and when they give us tips, we get more money. Was that a run on sentence or was that a run on sentence? So anyways, the room is set up with like 40+ round tables, I go out into the audience, and this is my experience.

TABLE ONE:
Kyla: Can I interest anyone in coming up and dancing with me?
Some guy: NOSE GOES!! (Thank you, Sir. I didn’t realize we had teleported to second period Losada)
Table Members: Hahaha! You lost! (points at loser of nose goes)
Kyla: Ah, looks like you’re coming up with me!
Loser of Nose Goes: No.
Kyla: The rules of Nose Goes are pretty iron clad, I’m pretty sure you have to come up with me…
Other table members: Go! Go!
Loser of Nose Goes: No.
Kyla: Well, ok. If you’re sure…
L.O.N.G.: No.

Alright, so table one = lost cause. Please keep in mind that I have a smile plastered on my face, and I’m acting more jovial and friendly than you’ve probably ever witnessed. Or maybe I picked on some unsuspecting man with a speech impediment who could only say no. Anyways, moving on to table two…

Kyla: Can I interest anyone in coming up and dancing with me?
Table Members: Jason! Go!
Jason: Nooo, I don’t think so…
Table Members: C’mon! Go Jason!
Kyla: Yeah, c’mon Jason!
Jason: I don’t know…
Kyla: Put down your beer, come up and dance with me!
Jason: YOU’RE NOT MY AA SPONSOR!!!!

Ummmm….ummmm….hmmmm….ummmm…ok. So maybe it was best that I didn’t go with Jason, seeing as how…well, you know what? There’s a million things I could finish that sentence with, but I won’t. You pick your favorite and fill in the blank.

So, dejected and somewhat relieved I didn’t witness what would happen if I separated Jason from his beer, I finally get someone up from another table. Who turned out to be HILARIOUS. I’ve done this “pick up” thing many, many, many times, and this guy topped the charts. He was superb.

And that’s the name of that tune.