7.19.07

Today has been a shit day.

Do you ever have that revelation that your friends aren't your friends? These fucking people parade around pretending to care about you, when the funny thing is, they could give a shit. I put myself last to a FAULT. I will put everyone else's needs before mine. Funny though, how no one would do that for me.

What about me screams, "take advantage of me!"? Fucking doormat Kyla, that's what I am. Go ahead. Walk all over me. Take advantage of that fact that I, unlike you, give a shit about my friends. Don't ask me how the fuck i'm doing, just tell me what you need me to do and expect me to do it for you. Lie to me, I won't find out. Don't fucking wait 24 hours, it's not like I'm worth it anyways. Hi, I'm Kyla. Could you use me, please?

I'm not saying this to get some bullshit "Kyla, i'm always here for you". Because the funny thing is YOU'RE NOT. Your life, your problems take fucking presidence over everything else in life, myself included. Hell, tell ME about your problems! Please! It's not like I ever have anything of value to say anyways!

And I'm not saying this so I can hear your sad little tales of how your friends forgot to invite you to a party once in your entire life.

And you're all sitting there, whether you'll admit it or not, thinking "man, Kyla's being a whiney little bitch".

Fuck it. I could give a shit.